A Downloading Frenzy....

I've always listened to music from the late 50s to early 60s -- it's the music I grew up listening to. The music my parents still dance to when they can find a good band. The music I know the lyrics to, almost as well as the early-to-mid 80s music I was "into" in high school and early college and definitely better than what's come out since then, with the notable exception of my beloved U2.

San Diego used to have great "oldies" radio stations that would play the greats, but lately the station that used to play "oldies" from the 50s, 60s, and 70s has now stooped to the insulting play of "oldies" from the 80s! Yup, 80s music is everywhere (not that I'm complaining), but having the music of my youth being relegated to "oldies" when I'm only 41 is a bit hard to take.

But more than that, I miss the TRUE classics. So last night, i-Tunes gift card from my brother gripped in hand, I went on a downloading frenzy of the REAL "oldies but goodies." This is what I have bought and downloaded to my i-Pod:

The Platters:
"Goodnight Sweetheart"
"My Prayer"
"Only You"

Deon and the Belmonts:
"Runaround Sue" (my mom's favorite dance song)
"The Wanderer"
"Teenager in Love"

The Beach Boys:
"I Get Around"
"Fun, Fun, Fun"

Bobby Darin:
"Splish Splash"

Jan and Dean:
"Surf City"

Ricky Nelson:
"Garden Party"
"Travelin' Man"

Little Anthony and the Imperials:
"Tears on My Pillow"

The Drifters:
"Save the Last Dance for Me"
"Under the Boardwalk"

Now THOSE are classics. I think they'll be happy to join my old favorite Roy Orbison (a double CD set, thank you very much!) on my i-Pod. Now to borrow and download Mom's Elvis collection....

A New BHAG

Well, it's really a new incarnation of an old BHAG. For those of you who aren't familiar with the term BHAG, it stands for Big Hairy Audacious Goal. It's a term often in use among a group of women I've known online for eight years.

Anyway, today I was goofing around on the computer, procrastinating beautifully and thus ignoring the dust cloth and the basket of bathroom cleaning solutions at my feet. The AOL mail page had a lovely red tab labeled "Online Degrees." Well, that's certainly something worth checking out. I followed the labyrinth of links to various universities and degrees, finding nothing to my liking whatsoever.

Then the idea popped into my head: why not check out the seminary where Johanna and my own pastor have attended? I'll bet THEY have some interesting courses available. And did I ever find one that spoke to my heart and soul! The course title is "Christian Classics," (right up my alley, to say the VERY least!) and the main textbook is the very book I'm reading a second time for Lent: Richard Foster's Devotional Classics. Now, the other two texts look extremely interesting as well: Christian History, Issue 37: "Worship in the Early Church" and 100 Christian Books That Changed the Century. I was salivating onto my beleagured laptop.

Wiping away the drool, I quickly printed a copy of the syllabus. Then I saw the date: begins April 30. Oh well, I'm arriving home from North Carolina that night, and it is a very intensive class, so it's probably beyond my strength just now. I still e-mailed Johanna immediately, and she assured me that the course was the first one she took at Bethel and it was tops. Sigh -- I wish I could enroll right this very minute, but it just doesn't seem possible at the present time.

So I'm adding taking this course to my list of BHAGs which currently include: creating an English country garden; learning to play the piano; living in Great Britain for an entire calendar year; learning to spin and weave; taking a literary tour through Boston, Concord, and Prince Edward Island; learning to sing well enough to blend into a choir; spending two weeks at a monastery in complete silence; learning Latin, and relearning German.

BHAGs keep me going when the going gets tough. When I am up to my eyeballs in home school math assignments and science experiments, when I am overwhelmed by a dirty house and impossible yard, when the kids are quarreling and being distinctly unkind to one another, and when I have no time to myself whatsoever, THEN I think of my BHAGs and think: SOME DAY. And I smile my secret smile to myself and go on to the next thing in my busy, crazy life.

A Simon and Garfunkel Moment....

My dear friend Kim signed to Simon and Garfunkel's "Bridge over Troubled Waters" yesterday in our worship service at Lake Murray, and I found myself in tears. Sobbing, actually. Her signed songs usually make me cry as they touch my heart so deeply, but this time, even though she signed it about four years ago and I was ready with Kleenex in hand, I found myself sobbing. Yes, sobbing in church with Kitty's arm around my shoulders. Why was I crying over an old Simon and Garfunkel tune? Because the Holy Spirit was speaking to me, using the song as a promise, a benediction, an anointing.

On Thursday I received good news from Dr. Adema: the cortisol is probably the "missing link" in my treatment, and we may be able to start to lower my pain medications in a couple of months! When I asked him what he envisioned for me two years down the road, he said, "No more fentanyl. Keep on with the cortisol and thyroid meds. And you should be much improved." After more than five years of weariness and chronic pain, after five years of various diagnoses of fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, rheumatoid arthritis, and various lesser issues, what great news! What a blessing!

And the song that Kim signed spoke the same thing: the weariness, the pain, the darkness -- all being pushed aside to allow healing and newness. My "time to shine" has come and my "dreams are on their way"! A benediction indeed. And a definite easing of my mind.

Here are the lyrics:

When you're weary, feeling small,
When tears are in your eyes, I will dry them all;
I'm on your side when times get rough
And friends just can't be found,
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.

When you're down and out,
When you're on the street,
When evening falls so hard
I will comfort you.
I'll take your part.
When darkness comes
And pain is all around,
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.

Sail on silvergirl,
Sail on by.
Your time has come to shine.
All your dreams are on their way.
See how they shine.
If you need a friend
I'm sailing right behind.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will ease your mind.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will ease your mind.

Palm Sunday

Aaaah, Holy Week is here with Palm Sunday. I was thrilled to arrive at Lake Murray this morning and see palm fronds laid out at the base of the stairs that go upstairs to the sanctuary. In the foyer, smaller fronds were on the information area and a small frond was under a bird's nest filled with speckled Easter eggs. Inside the sanctuary were smaller fronds along the back wall and huge ones standing upright on the stage. For years and years at this church we had no mention of Palm Sunday, no palms, nothing at all different to mark the day. I would have preferred the Scripture verses about Jesus coming into Jerusalem, but the kids got it all heavily in their Sunday School classes, with T bringing home some real fronds and B making a paper one.

The Anglican Church on Palm Sunday reads Matthew 27 together, everyone taking parts such as Pilate, Pilate's wife, Christ, narrator, and everyone else is the crowd crying out "Crucify him! Crucify him!" Powerful stuff -- I wish I could have been there. I'm sure it's hard to cry out to crucify our Lord, but then it's our own sin that sent Him to the Cross in the first place. In the pictures from Alpine Anglican, the crucifix is covered in purple cloth, with palms tied behind in an X. The congregation made palm crosses together after the service so they can display and save the palms to burn for next year's Ash Wednesday service: today's palms become next year's ashes. Pretty cool thing, I think.

As Holy Week begins, I desire to fast from sweets (I've been doing a terrible job this Lent so hope to do better this last and most important week) and on Good Friday I want to do an oatmeal/rice fast. As I have hypoglycemia, I can't fast completely, but will take only the simplest of substance to keep my blood sugar level. I will also read only Christian books this week, focusing especially on Devotional Classics by Richard Foster. I had planned to read it over Lent but got behind, so I'm hoping to catch up this week. I'm going to continue reading the novel I've been working on for a couple of weeks, Michael D. O'Brien's Cry of Stone, which is about faith, sacrifice, and art. O'Brien is a Catholic writer and visual artist from Canada, and this work is very unlike previous works I've read by him, like Father Elijah. It's more than proper and helpful literature for Holy Week.

I also hope to attend services with Alpine Anglican this week. Wednesday is a Passover Seder, Maundy Thursday a footwashing, Good Friday an ecumenical Stations and an evening service, and Holy Saturday an evening vigil. I'm looking forward GREATLY to Holy Week, as I always do. May the Lord use it to change and soften my heart toward Him and make me ever more grateful for Christ's sacrifice once for all, and especially for me.

113 Days, 6 Hours, and 11 Minutes....

Yes, the countdown is ON! It's actually been on for quite a while now in our household, but with the new cover art being released this week, we're all in a flurry.

What's it all about? Harry Potter, of course!

Yes, the Scholastic cover art for the seventh and last book was released this week. E has been hovering over Mugglenet.com, analyzing the details of the illustration as well as checking out the UK versions (both children and adult). All kinds of clues to the events of the seventh book abound: Why is Harry wandless? Is he in a coliseum/arena? Who is the creature on Harry's back with a dagger? Where is all the treasure located? What's the reflection in Harry's glasses? (Those last three stem from the UK cover art.)

E and I have gone around and around, guessing and surmising about the seventh book and what will happen. Will Voldemort be defeated? (YES!) Will Harry die? (Hope not, but how else will she avoid writing more HP books?) Will Hagrid die? Ron? Ginny? Hermione? (Not Hermione!!!) Will Snape turn out to be a good guy or is he as bad as he appears at the end of the sixth book? (I think he'll turn out good, much to my chagrin.) How will Dumbledore return? (I'm betting on the portrait or something to do with Fawkes, somehow.) Will Harry locate all the horcruxes? Will they return to Hogwarts at all? (Hope so, at least to visit Dumbledore's portrait.) What role will Draco play? Will he come over from the "dark side" and fight for what is right and good?

And I'm not even considering all the surmises and questions E haas related to me from Mugglenet....

The summer release of the Order of the Phoenix movie is thrilling, but it's the Deathly Hallows I can't wait for. After much debating, I've decided to let the speedier reader get the (already pre-ordered from B&N) book first. All I can say is that E had better read FAST (and keep her mouth shut!) until I can get my hands on it....

Also 'Tis the Season

Spring brings my favorite holyday, or should I say week?

I love Holy Week! After the contemplation (something I hope for but never quite attain with four children at home!) of Lent, the extra time in devotionals, prayer, confession, and God's Word, I'm ready (or as ready as I'm gonna be) to walk in Jesus' footsteps during Holy Week.

Palm Sunday isn't Palm Sunday without palms. Pastor Rollo started us off with palms about five years ago, and they've appeared most years. Before Rollo covered the aisle with palms, Palm Sunday was no different from any other Sunday, a fact that drove me crazy! So I'm hoping, even with Pastor Steve out of town, that someone will strew palm fronds around the auditorium. Fingers crossed and hoping hard....

On Wednesday, I hope to attend an instructional Passover Seder with Alpine Anglican. Last year we had one at Lake Murray that was tremendously well done, but this year our pastor and 15 other guys are on a missions trip to Idaho, so no Seder. Rollo had started us off with a Seder a few years ago, and I've found it has become an integral part of my Holy Week remembrances. The symbolism, the Scriptures, the connection between Old and New Covenants, it's all unbelievably memorable.

Maundy Thursday has always been a favorite Holy Week service. This will be the third time I've spent it with Alpine Anglican. The last time that Alpine Anglican had their lovely church building (which they lost when they left the San Diego Episcopal diocese), Father asked me to participate, and it was simply amazing to have my foot washed by the Bishop. I was in tears the whole time -- such a lovely, humble service, and exactly what our Lord commanded us to do. I'm looking forward to this service especially.

In the past, Good Friday has been an on-again, off-again thing at Lake Murray. Last year we had the Seder on Maundy Thursday and therefore no service for Good Friday except for the Biblical Stations of the Cross I set up. I will set up the Stations again this week, to be available Tuesday-Friday during Holy Week in the auditorium at Lake Murray. The year before that, we had a wonderful Good Friday service, complete with nailing our sins to a cross that Keith built; the reverberations of the hammer blows had almost everyone in tears as we heard and felt Jesus' suffering and death for US. Wow -- mindblowing! So last year and again this year, I'm planning on spending Good Friday with the Anglicans, perhaps even the noon ecumenical Stations of which Father Acker is in charge.

This year Lake Murray is having a Good Friday service at God's Extended Hand, the homeless shelter we serve at the first Friday of each month; they're also planning another nailing ceremony as well. But it's awfully far away -- over fifty miles. And I loved the Anglican service last year in Father Acker's dining room as we kissed the feet of the crucifix, remembering how Christ suffered and died for US. So humbling! Again, many tears here, but that's my specialty....

However, I have never attended a Saturday Vigil, and may attend this service with the Anglicans as well. On Easter morning, I would LOVE to attend both Alpine Anglican AND Lake Murray. As there's no Sunday School at Lake Murray, it's perfectly do-able, if Keith agrees. I would love to experience the different ways the Resurrection is celebrated in both churches, liturgical and evangelical. After all, it IS the best celebration in the Church Year, so let's truly CELEBRATE, for He is risen indeed!

Aah, Holy Week! The high point of the Christian Year!

'Tis the Season...

For dancing!

Yes, the new season of "Dancing with the Stars" is underway, and E and I, as always, find ourselves spellbound by these non-dancers who become so good so quickly. This season, E has a new appreciation of their hard work as she has been taking ballroom lessons through the California Junior Cotillion since last October where she learned the waltz and the East Coast Swing.

If the women's dresses were a bit more modest, it would be the perfect show. Of course, the rub comes when the results show runs at the same time as our all-time favorite, "House M.D." So "Dancing" was recorded but not watched last night, and this morning, to our horror, we found that Paulina was voted off. Now, E and I really liked her. Admittedly, she was a bit "stiff and starchy" as Len, the head judge, stated, but she was so lovely and had much more potential than Clyde or Billy Ray, neither of whom should last long, in my humble opinion.

My favorite is Apolo; his speedskating doesn't necessarily translate well into dancing, but he's got great rhythm and style. Right now he's in third place in the judge's voting, and I think he'll move up. E's favorite is Heather, whom she admires for dancing with a definite disability; I think the back walkover really impressed her this week.

Now that Cotillion is finished until next fall, I suppose I should find my girl some more ballroom classes. Google, here I come....

Time for Resting on the Rock

This past weekend was our church's women's retreat, held here at the Bible Camp in our small town. So a goodly number of our church women came trooping up the mountain, ready for anything. My friend Sheri, who lives here in town, came for the second year. Our speaker, Judith, is a dear friend of mine and also a resident of our town.

It was a lovely time -- so lovely, in fact, that words seem absolutely inadequate. My favorite part, besides being enthralled by our very gifted speaker, was spending four hours alone, writing in my journal, catching up on my devotionals, reading and responding to an excerpt from my Lenten devotional by Julian of Norwich. Becoming slightly sunburned as the sun warmed my face, I relaxed in my aged striped beach chair, bare toes snuggling into the green lawn, writing desk (courtesy of dear Kitty) on my lap, ink and dip pen balanced perfectly as I wrote.

It's so seldom that I get time to write like that ... uninterrupted by small people who need me or who need a referee for a quarrel. That's heaven on earth to me right now: silence and solitude. Not that I didn't thoroughly enjoy our fellowship: we laughed and yelled over Catch Phrase; we acted out Bible stories in charades; we cried together as we worshiped; we sang hymns and praise songs with passion and devotion. It was the perfect balance of fun and fellowship, of silence and laughter, of exhortation and practical jokes.

Now if only I could do so once a month....

E's Last Dance

E just finished her six-month course with the California Junior Cotillion with a "Sock-Hop" style Spring Dance. Learning the "East Coast Swing" has been both fun and challenging, with different moves like the outside-inside turn, the crossover turn, the transfer, the "slide" and finally the "washing machine." Here she's dancing again with Travis, the same guy whom we pictured from the Winter Ball. He's one of the better dancers and is tall enough for E to dance with easily.

E is wearing one of my mother's formals from the late '50s; it runs a little short on E as she's a few inches taller than my mother, but Mom was glad to lend it to her for the occasion. I'm sure glad we keep formal dresses in this family! The other girls were mostly wearing poodle skirts and looked straight out of "Grease." But E was a step above, and made a lovely picture as she twirled and swirled around the 1920s-era ballroom at the San Diego Women's Club, the very club to which her great-great-great grandmother belonged.

History repeats itself more often than we know....

Another Gardening Day...

These two weeks of 80-degree weather have spoiled me completely. Usually March sends our small mountain town our deepest snowfalls. But this March has me outside almost every day, watering my garden and trying to get what's left of out poor beleagured lawn to green up.

So this afternoon I planted my herb garden around my bird bath: sage, lavender, peppermint and spearmint, English thyme, French rosemary, and plain parsley (cilantro). The curled parsley I planted two years ago keeps popping back up, and it's doing nicely now, as is a large patch of thyme and a few other kinds of lavender. I also planted a few perenial flowers to create a little color as well.

As I drove through town on my way to visit Judith and pick up a library book, I saw so many people out in their yards pruning, sweeping, gardening, or at least doing something to their yards.

It's definitely that kind of weather. Even the daffodils are yielding to real springtime.