I just didn't feel an affinity to the prompt for Day 8 for the Nov PAD Challenge on Poetic Asides, so I put together two prompts into one. The first one is from The High Calling which asked for a catalog poem. Carry on Tuesday Prompt #78 was the first line of an ancient folk song "My Love": "Do you remember what we promised when we met...?" So here is the combination of the two prompts:
Do You Remember?
Do you remember
when the leaves fell
dark and dank,
clinging to your boots,
the rain pilfering thoughts,
robbing our years remaining?
Do you remember
when snow quilted our meadow,
sheathing us into our home
as days gleaned our hours--
the fire blooming anew,
swallowing seasoned oak hungrily?
Do you remember
when spring arrived fresh,
pale blossoms peopling Pippin boughs--
our meadow greening thick with
warming winds tossing kites wild,
and you pledged promises sweet?
Do you remember
when summer heat swelled peaches plump,
beaches brimming wetly, waves curling
into themselves like titans clashing--
in short nights we hugged late coolness,
praying arrival of crisp autumn?
Do you remember
who I am, Sweetheart?
Copyright 2010 by Susanne Barrett
Poetically yours,
19 comments:
You are really powering through this challenge - I'm so impressed!
I'm making myself "power through"...I hadn't written much since July so it feels good to engage in poetry again. One learns by doing.... :)
This poem raises so many questions.
it's awesome!
lOVELY POEM, such a delight to read :)
Short Poems
"as days gleaned our hours--"
that's lovely and bittersweet.
Thanks,
Kathy
Well done. I've always liked the use of seasons in poetry, and I like that you started with autumn rather than, as is typical, with spring.
"when summer heat swelled peaches"
Oh, I can remember. And I love that.
A lot of great turns of phrase here. I love the idea of rain pilfering thoughts.
So vivid! What a feast for the senses. Beaches brimming wetly -- that is absolutely stunning.
reminded me of marillion's song kayleigh..do you remember...?
nice - i liked your meditative meanderings...
in short nights we hugged late coolness...loved this!!
Susanne, noticed some excellent word choices and phrasing, especially with action verbs and descriptions with -ing suffix. Creates a powerful sense of movement through your lines.
Thank you, everyone, for your kind comments. I treasure each of them. I have followed the blogtrails and found most of your work, too--and your richness of expression and depth of thought and emotion are stunning.
Thank you again for stopping by.
Solid work.
Of course I remember you, (takes quick peek at name tag) Suzanne!
(LOL!)
A nice One Shot (and whatever else)
Love the repitition and flow of this beautiful poem...thought provoking and wonderfully written!
:-)
This is such strong, evocative writing, Susanne. I love the premise.
Victoria
Dear Susanne
Very beautiful.. the imagery of snow quilting in your words
Do you remember
when snow quilted our meadow,
was perfect.. thanks for sharing..
ॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
Twitter: @VerseEveryDay
Blog: http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com
This is just gorgeous. So glad to find you through High Calling Blogs! I'm one of the Welcome Editors and really, really enjoyed your poem. I will be back to read more, for sure!
I'm with Kath about the "days gleaning our hours," but there is a LOT to like here. I especially love the tightness of the sounds. The internal rhyme and alliteration start to overwhelm me toward the end, and I want to read the third and fourth stanzas out loud.
Post a Comment